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Things than make you go: hmmm...

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There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle. I support you in choosing a miracle.
CLM - Career Limiting Moves
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A CLM is a "Career Limitiing Move".  This happens most often out of speaking or doing without completely thinking through the results.

Why would I write about this? Well, because of my advise regarding certain things that have gone on in my spouse's employment that I was aware of, I successfully prevented her from making a CLM.  This has resulted in her having an opportunity to interview for a position which is a significant improvement to her career and personal goals.

This is great for her and I very proud of her for this.

Hind sight is 20/20.  My advise to her came from my own experience and failures.  Would that it had been I would have learned from others instead.

I had a review from a previous manager a couple of years ago.  He deliberately gave me the impression that the company was watching me for advancement, but that I needed to work on my leadership skills.

This left me puzzled.  Leadership skills?  Really?  I run a family of 9, I usually have other families living with us at the same time.  I ran a consulting business for several years.  Somehow I have been able to organize and keep everyone focussed towards the common good.  I have been involved in ministry for years, I have worked on the board of directors for more than one non-profit organization for many years.  

My resume of accomplishments asside, what could he have possibly been referring to?

Over the last 3-6 months I have been doing alot of introspection or soul searching.  A self re-examination of my interactions with my co-workers, my friends, people in the synagogue I attend, and of course my family.  Honestly, I don't like what I've seen at every instance. 

It would be easy to block out the negatives and only focus on my successes.  If I were being interviewed I might just do that.  It would be even easier to try to justify my failures.  It would still not be beneficial ovar all.

I've not just been reviewing the last 3-6 months, but digging back through over 25yrs of work history.  Where did I go wrong?  Why did I not get a promotion?  Why did I not get training that I was in line for?  Why was I laid off?  Why was a contract dropped?

The reality is most of those negative things were my own doing.  I tend to be a very open person.  Sometimes a little too open.  A little too honest.  When I see things going down a bad path, I usually express myself.  

I've been in management and leadership roles for a long time.  There is a need in those roles for a positive attitude and silence.  I have trouble with both at times. I have a real problem with expressing to people my frustration with other people that we hold in common.  I'm not really trying to create strife, but that can be the end result.

In my religious world this would be called "lashon hara", or evil speech.  It is one of the most difficult things to overcome.  This is speech that has harmful intent.  It may be the truth, but it is done to cause harm.

How much harm?  Well, that it tough.  In Judaism evil speech (gossip) is said to kill at least three persons:  The one who spoke it, the one who heard it, and the one whom it was about.  For me, I am just venting.  I don't really expect change, and I don't really expect anyone to change their mind or opinion based on my own.  I certainly did not want to cause issues or exacerbate them. Yet, my negative venting caused harm - whether I realized it or not.

How I express myself to others in my environment affects their opinion of the same.  How has my expression of dissappointment in the outcome of a corporate meeting or departmental meeting subverted the overall attitude of my collegues?  I don't know that it has had any affect at all.  What I do know is that there are times in every team when various team members are not happy for a variety of reasons.  I know that my playing into that is not helpful to the team.  It does not help us overcome and move forward.

I am hoping to take a new direction in my attitude and approach.  I don't know if I can get a promotion where I am, it may be too late.  I don't know that my current employer has any roles that logistically I can successfully perform without religious comprimise.  I may have burned my bridges and scattered their ashes.  I know I have done that in the past.

But maybe not.I work for a good growing company.  Like all larger companies, it has it's problems.  Nothing that cannot be overcome in time with proper positive leadership.

I hope and pray that I can overcome and cease to create my own Career Limiting Moves.  I am hopeful that this is a step in a new direction for me.  Perhaps, if you are reading this, it will be for you as well.  I am sure that I will be coming back to this and tweaking it over the next week or two as I clarify my thoughts more

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Another one down...

As it happens, my wife did not get the promotion.  She was very disappointed.  She has asked me if she can go into an LVN program to improve her credentials.  Although, from my knowledge of the industry, I would prefer her to get into an Associates RN program, I know that the LVN will be a better path for her. 

She was going to do this part time if she got the promotion.  However, now that the promotion is off the table, she will likely go full time at school and take a leave from work while she gets this done.

I know she really doesn't want to quit where she is.  She loves it there and their benefits for people with that stay with the company are amazing.  She is hopeful to be able to work out some kind of leave while finishing school.

The promotion would have made the commute viable after we move to the farm.  Without the promotion, the income just doesn't justify the commute.  She can work closer for less dollars-per-hour and net more.

I've got a list of all the state certified LVN schools.  We are checking them for the ones that are closest to our farm.  So far Paris, TX is the winner.

One school offered e-learning with on-campus clinicals on weekends.  That one is tempting, but Gainesville, TX is about 2hrs from the farm.

Whether she gets to stay with this company or not, her income potential will increase.  Plus most of the schools offer an LVN to Associates RN upgrade path.  And many offer a AS RN to BS RN upgrade path.  So it is a whole lot better path than Medical Assisting (No upgrade path, dead end jobs, too many people - not enough jobs).

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